Chapter 5 from my new book

I just finished and sent my book, A 95 Year-old Man’s Path to Living Longer and Better, to a London
publisher. An excerpt:

Chapter 5
The Supreme Pleasure

Sex has become
one of the most discussed subjects
of modern times.
The Victorians pretended
it did not exist;
the moderns pretend
that nothing else exists.
Bishop Fulton Sheen (1895-1979)

Were we designed and created primarily to experience pleasure? Pleasure is the feeling of being pleased or gratified.
It’s a source of enjoyment, of delight and sensual gratification. It is a subjective experience that can vary with
different people depending upon their individual tastes, that is summed up in this ancient Latin phrase:
De gustibus non est disputandum.
Tastes cannot be disputed.

A good example that is is repugnant to me is sadomasochism (sey-doh-mas uh-kiz-uhm), which is a sexual activity
where one person enjoys inflicting physical suffering on another person, who derives pleasure from experiencing
the pain. Definitely not me thing!
It seems that the Sense of Pleasure was hard-wired into our genes just as our Sense of Beauty was, and that they
go together “like a horse and carriage.” Longevity is not enough. Intuitively, we all want to be happy, to have a
keen sense of Well-Being, to be as contented as a well-fed cat, to have Peace of Mind, to experience joy, to be
successful, to achieve Self-Fulfillment and to occasionally arrive at a state of bliss.

Unfortunately, relatively few people worldwide are lucky enough to experience these pleasures. We can view their
plight every night on the evening news on TV. I often think about how fortunate I am, and with compassion in my
heart for the innocent victims of crazed world leaders, like North Korea’s Supreme Leader, Kim Jong-Un who ordered
and watched his country’s latest ballistic launch, simulating nuclear strikes on U.S. backed bases in South Korea,
I say, “There but for the Grace of God go I.”
All five of our physical senses, sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch, were originally designed and used to help
our cavemen forebears survive in a hostile environment for obvious reasons. Then, gradually, over thousands of years,
all five survival senses mysteriously and thankfully became sources of Pleasure.
To my mind, the inclusion of Pleasure and our Sense of Beauty into our survival senses, are Miracles. Think about how
boring and dull life would be if there were no music, dancing, sports or art, and if Sex were solely a matter of
producing offspring with no pleasure involved, as is the case with many other species of animals.
Our Sense of Pleasure, which is in the Supernatural Realm of Feelings, enables us to enjoy gourmet foods that our taste
buds react to and send their messages electrically to our brains where our Minds delight in them. Our gourmet appetites
even include expensive, vintage wines that some people are willing to pay much as $1,000 (£690) for a bottle. How is it
that the cells in our taste buds became sources of pleasure? Some other ways we have benefitted from the ability of our
five survival senses to experience pleasure, allowing us to enjoy:
1. Sweets, like ice cream, cakes and candy.
2. Expensive perfumes and lotions, and the pleasure we get from smelling fragrant flowers, like roses and carnations.
3. Touching the smooth skin of those we love and smooth objects, like Prayer Stones. (Google them)
4. Art masterpieces that please the eye like Michelangelo’s Pieta and da Vinci’s Mona Lisa.
5. The many forms of music that please the ear, such as symphonies (Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony), operas (Carmen) and songs
(Dolly Parton’s romantic I Will Always Love You.)
6. Somewhere along the line a keen Sense of Beauty emerged that enabled us to find pleasure in movies (musicals like
Gene Kelly’s Singing in the Rain), in Literature (Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet), in People (Beauty Pageants), in Nature
(Rainbows, Sunrises and Sunsets, the Grand Canyon, the Taj Mahal in India, Niagara Falls and views from the Tops of Mountains.)
I once teasingly told a preacher that God made a big mistake. He said sternly, “God never makes a mistake!” I said, “He sure
did when he made Sex so darn pleasurable! Think of all the serious problems that has caused: Prostitution, rapes, pedophilia,
adultery, divorces, you name it.” Then I added: “But it’s worth it, isn’t it!?”
Sex is one of a very few activities where we humans can experience the acme of all pleasures, Ecstasy. I have no idea how our
cavemen felt about it, but all I want to say about it is WOW! and I am still saying it.
During the British Victorian Era (1837-1901) masturbation was referred to as that solitary vice. I wonder if our attitudes
during all those years were handed down via prudish religions?
Freelance writer and editor had this to say about the benefits of regular sex in an article titled: Is Sex Good for Your Skin?
(February 13, 2015):
“… If you’re planning to get close with someone you love, you might get more benefits than you think. It turns out that sex also
has benefits for your skin….But there’s more…It’s enjoyable, and you release a lot of endorphins from the feeling of touch.
…Having sex 1-2 times a week can help increase antibodies that can boost your immune system and help fight colds and reduce
toxins…and act as a natural painkiller.”
She also says it improves overall health, there is less depression and can boost self-esteem. And, lastly, regarding
“solitary vice,” she says, “Masturbation also receives these benefits. Orgasms, no matter how they come, reduces your stress level.”
In living up to my name, I will now be perfectly frank. When my first wife, Babs, died suddenly after being a loving companion for
57 years, I, at 82, had a very difficult time going “cold turkey” re sex. Being alone was like being in solitary confinement. One
of my concerns was that if I didn’t use it, I’d lose it. For a year or so, to allay the fear of becoming impotent, I regularly
engaged in the solitary vice. I believe, in view of my current ability to have an orgasm, that it was a smart thing to do, and
during a visit to my urologist, I found out he thought so too.
Another interesting observation about the possibility that pleasure was destined to become one of our most treasured sensory
improvements is the evolution of a woman’s clitoris. It’s the only organ in a human body specifically designed to generate pleasure.
From an evolution perspective, it doesn’t play an important role in survival of the fittest, or even in reproduction. But, it does,
fortunately, provide women with a considerable amount of pleasure long after their child-bearing years are over.
Talking about a woman’s Clitoris is another sex-related taboo. Here too, a needed change is taking place. This is what I found when
I Googled clitoris:
Weird News
by David Moye
May 2, 2015
The first ever “International Clitoris Awareness Week” takes place May 6-12. Mention the word “clitoris” and some people get touchy —
and not in a good way.
But that could change quickly because May 6–12 is the first ever “International Clitoris Awareness Week,” a seven-day period designed
to celebrate the female body part….
“… We’ve noticed that the clitoris has not gotten its spot in the limelight. It makes people feel uncomfortable,” she told The Huffington
Post. “For this week, we want people to feel free to talk about one of the most important sources of pleasure for women without any
It was once verboten to talk about oral sex, but not anymore. It’s not uncommon to hear actors use the word blowjob and see a woman make
the motions of doing it. I say this to justify what I am about to say. You can find out a lot more by just Googling Oral sex, which I have
done out of sheer curiosity. My-o-my how things have changed since I was a naïve teenager! Here’s an example of what I found to be enlightening:
A News Item:
The Guardian
A British National Daily Newspaper
June 5, 2013
Michael Douglas has struck a blow for oral sex
by Holly Baxter
In the past couple of days, cunnilingus has made a comeback (pun intended). Ever since Michael Douglas claimed that his marathon sessions
had given him oral cancer, rather than the slightly more obvious culprits of drinking and smoking, everyone’s had something to say about
There seems to be an implication that Douglas’s cancer was caused not by the good kind of oral sex with your loving and devoted wife, but
The good kind of oral sex with your loving and devoted wife is the kind I engage in. But, as with the topic of masturbation, which most
everybody engages at one time or another, it’s been taboo to talk about it, Apparently, it’s not a verboten topic anymore, as the above
article in The Guardian indicates.
I prowled the internet Googling Oral Sex and Women’s orgasms, and found lots of stuff including this:
Sex Positions & Techniques
The best sexual positions and the finest love-making techniques
Advice for men and women – making oral sex better with your lover!
Cunnilingus – oral sex by him for her – making it great!
A lot of women would agree that oral sex – cunnilingus – is more important than intercourse. Why? Not because this is something to
diminish the male ego, but because oral sex produces orgasms. While an average or slightly larger than average penis may be nice to
look at and play with, oral sex really rocks most women’s boats.
In some ways these are the worst of times, with our wars, our deteriorating infrastructure and the danger of being attacked by terrorist.
In other ways, these are the best of times, with the availability of computers, iPads and medical advancements. It wasn’t until my 50th
year of the 57 years I was married to Babs that we engaged in oral sex, and to my surprise and delight, she suddenly and quite unexpectedly,
initiated it. Of course, I reciprocated, and it became a standard way for us to demonstrate our continuing love for each other. I mention
this simply to illustrate how times have changed, and for the better. The current openness about sex between couples committed to each other
is a real plus. In fact I learned a lot from reading the articles about oral sex via the internet, which has made our sex life far more
The original function of women’s breasts was to feed their babies. As with the five senses, breasts became important sources of Pleasure Why?
God only knows, for sure. Regardless, most men, including yours truly, would find this image quite attractive, and I’m also sure women are
well aware of this.

The implied message? “Come and get it!”
Psychology Today
Dr. Nigel Barber
May 7, 2013
Sexual Wiring of Women’s Breasts
Neuroscientists establish breasts as sexual organs
If men have sex on the brain, they are not alone. Recent research found that women’s sensory cortex has three distinct areas
corresponding to stimulation of the clitoris, vagina, and cervix. To their surprise, researchers found that self stimulation
of the nipples lights up the same areas. This sheds further light on the sexual importance of breasts. From a functional perspective,
this means that the breast doubles as a truly sexual organ. It is not just an exciting visual stimulus for (most) men but also a key
source of sexual pleasure for most women.
I live in Daytona Beach, Florida, where, once a year there is a festival called Bike Week when thousands of motorcycle riders invade
the city to have a rousing good time. One of the things male bikers do is to yell at busty women, “Show me your tits!” When they do,
the bikers tosses a necklace with plastic beads at them, which the women grab and add to the others around their necks. Like most males,
I say unabashedly, “Viva la tits!”
Why am I, an old man, exposing myself to possible criticism for being so frank about such a seemingly personal matter? First, I no longer
consider the kind of “Sex Talk” I have engaged in above to be “Dirty.” If fact, to my mind, there is nothing dirty about Sex, and I certainly
don’t consider what I said above to be Gutter-Talk. My intent is simply to help those millions of Baby Boomers, Millennials and others
“see the light” re sex, because a healthy sex life is one of the most important elements in having along-term, happy relationship with a
compatible partner. And, the icing on the cake is that I am convinced that it plays a significant role in extending our lives as I think
it has mine.
Natural News
Sheryl Walters
January 22, 2009
Regular Sex Improves Health and Doubles Life Expectancy
You probably already know that broccoli, carrots, and oranges are good for you. Yet it’s rarely mentioned that having regular sex is not only
fantastically fun, but brilliant for your health! A study at Queens University in Belfast published in the British Medical Journal tracked the
sexuality of about 1,000 middle-aged men over the course of a decade. The study compared men of a similar age and health and showed that men
who reported the highest frequency of orgasm lived twice as long as those who did not enjoy sex. (Italics mine.)
I think you may be interested in knowing what could be in store for you, assuming you are middle-aged or so, when you become a senior citizen.
Yesterday, July 24, 2016, my wife and I spent about an hour in bed doing the honeymoon thing, and my self-esteem remains intact because I am
still able to experience a spine-chilling orgasm. Contributing to our compatibility is a pledge we made to each other that we would do all we
can to make each other happy. We decided one way to achieve that goal, is talk openly about what gives each of us the most pleasure.
I asked my primary doctor about my sexual capability at my age, and he said that performance was mainly due to “psychology,” meaning it was a
case of “mind over matter.” I find my wife to be very “desirable,” and nothing turns me on more than to see her lying in bed with her legs spread
wide and to hear her say, “Come and get it!”
It’s rather common knowledge that men are from Mars and women are romanticists from Venus.
So, I set the stage for romance. We have a TV in our bedroom I tune in to the easy-listening music channel that is pure music without lyrics.
I prepare a couple of wine coolers we drink while we nibble on chips. I take it slow and easy, and she appreciates my thoughtfulness.
I am extremely lucky to able to perform satisfactorily, without taking any pills, at age 95+ years of age. We have a routine we follow that
is very satisfactory for both of us, which includes oral sex. I refer to it jokingly as taking her to Australia. Before I do, I swish a mouthful
of vodka in my mouth to kill the bacteria our mouths are normally full of, then spit it out since I don’t need its calories. It pleases me when
she responds vocally as she climaxes. After allowing her time to savor the experience, then it’s my turn. One of the things I found out by trial
and error about my libido is that it takes at least a week for my batteries to recharge. I dread the day when they poop out for good!
The Rubáiyát of Omar Khayyám is the title that Edward FitzGerald gave to his translation of a selection of poems, originally written in Persian,
and of which there are about a thousand, attributed to Omar Khayyám (1048–1131), a Persian poet, mathematician and astronomer. The most quoted stanza:
A Book of Verses underneath the Bough,
A Jug of Wine, a Loaf of Bread–and Thou
Beside me singing in the Wilderness–
Oh, Wilderness were Paradise enow!
The Persian poem motivated me to write this:
The Rubáiyát of Francis T. Sganga
My Princess lies beside me;
Her head cradled,
In the crook of my arm.
Our legs are entwined,
As her breasts press against mine.
Our passionate kisses,
Are sweeter than wine
Can Heaven be better?
We are one,
Kissing mouth to mouth,
Tongue to tongue,
Soul to Soul.
We are lost to oblivion.
Oblivion is timeless,
As is the moment,
When two lovers savor
That final moment of Ecstasy.
Thank you, God,
For the eternal Gift of Love,
Would that it could last forever!

The Italian Stallion